The Second Coming of
Anthony Weiner
"This piece was originally written before our last presidential election but was never published. Now that Tony "The Weiner" is on his way to prison, the time seemed right."
Anthony Wiener, alias “Tony the Weiner” is married to Huma Abedin, Hillary Clinton’s right hand gal. “The Weiner,” as he shall henceforth be known, was a congressmen from New York City for about two hours before he sank his career by taking a picture of his namesake and sending it to a variety of women. After vacating his congressional seat in disgrace, The Weiner laid low for a while and then ran for the New York mayoral office. Not surprisingly, he found fairly widespread support from the Democratic Party and New Yorkers in general who vigorously latched onto The Wiener as a candidate. After all, he talked a good game and knew how to tickle the ears (and other special places) of the cities leftwing base.
Did it matter that he was a pervert? Not a bit. In fact, for a liberal, he was almost a choirboy.
Unfortunately, The Weiner couldn’t keep from exhibiting his namesake whenever possible. So, in the middle of his run for top mayoral job in all of the U.S.A., The Weiner got caught sexting with a cadre of different women, destroying the last shred of credibility he might’ve had.
That’s when a documentary filmmaker decided to make a film about the man and his mayoral run, which lamented how such an enlightened individual, just couldn’t seem to get past New York’s bourgeois expectations that showing your Johnson to every Tom, Dick and Harry wasn’t OK.
Now, on top of it all, it appears highly likely that The Weiner was sexting with a 15 year old girl for about a year. This is illegal and could lead to prison. So, you have to ask yourself “What could be worse than a caged Weiner?” How would The Weiner hold up in prison? Probably not so good.
Here’s the juicy part of the story; Hillary’s right hand gal, Huma Abedin, was privy to Hillary’s emails as Secretary of State, many of which were classified top secret, making them off-limits to Huma “Mrs. Weiner” Abedin. And, because she was married to The Weiner, blackmail—that most devious of crimes—could’ve led to all sorts of problems for both husband and wife.
Yes, not only were The Weiner’s personal shenanigans exposed to blackmail as the result of The Weiner exposing himself to underage girls, it could also expose America and our allies.
That, my friends, is a lot exposing. It might also be just the tip of the Wiener, as it penetrates deeply into Uncle Sam’s exposed backside. Which, let’s face it, could be very painful for the nation as a whole (or is that hole.)
Anyway. That is the Democratic Party today. A grotesque caricature of what it was in its heyday. Exactly what that was, I’m not sure. But, whatever it was, it had to be a whole lot better than what it is today.
What can I say, except, vote Trump!
Claude Hopper
Did it matter that he was a pervert? Not a bit. In fact, for a liberal, he was almost a choirboy.
Unfortunately, The Weiner couldn’t keep from exhibiting his namesake whenever possible. So, in the middle of his run for top mayoral job in all of the U.S.A., The Weiner got caught sexting with a cadre of different women, destroying the last shred of credibility he might’ve had.
That’s when a documentary filmmaker decided to make a film about the man and his mayoral run, which lamented how such an enlightened individual, just couldn’t seem to get past New York’s bourgeois expectations that showing your Johnson to every Tom, Dick and Harry wasn’t OK.
Now, on top of it all, it appears highly likely that The Weiner was sexting with a 15 year old girl for about a year. This is illegal and could lead to prison. So, you have to ask yourself “What could be worse than a caged Weiner?” How would The Weiner hold up in prison? Probably not so good.
Here’s the juicy part of the story; Hillary’s right hand gal, Huma Abedin, was privy to Hillary’s emails as Secretary of State, many of which were classified top secret, making them off-limits to Huma “Mrs. Weiner” Abedin. And, because she was married to The Weiner, blackmail—that most devious of crimes—could’ve led to all sorts of problems for both husband and wife.
Yes, not only were The Weiner’s personal shenanigans exposed to blackmail as the result of The Weiner exposing himself to underage girls, it could also expose America and our allies.
That, my friends, is a lot exposing. It might also be just the tip of the Wiener, as it penetrates deeply into Uncle Sam’s exposed backside. Which, let’s face it, could be very painful for the nation as a whole (or is that hole.)
Anyway. That is the Democratic Party today. A grotesque caricature of what it was in its heyday. Exactly what that was, I’m not sure. But, whatever it was, it had to be a whole lot better than what it is today.
What can I say, except, vote Trump!
Claude Hopper